photo/ willow/ magpie tales
JACK AND ME
Jack fell down.
I slipped and started to roll.
Over and over I went,
gravity showing no mercy,
nothing in my way to stop me.
I felt the crunch of October's leaves,
wintry reds and gray yellows
glossy with dew,
not softening my path,
but affixing themselves
like postage stamps,
poking my battered front and rear.
I gained thrust like a mythical goddess,
then felt a sharp pain
as I rolled over that broken crown
tumbling before me,
as if some wizard
had animated it
to mock me,
and win a race
to the bottom of the hill.
Pay attention
to what I say,
never go looking for water
at the top of a mountain
with a drunken monarch.
c copyright/all rights reserved/2010
This poem is in response to yet another terrific Prompt by Willow at Magpie Tales..who can resist..not many, for sure!!
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52 comments:
What a wonderful take on the prompt, I loved it!
Wonderful! i love it! and the humor at the end of the poem!
A Paradise of Spring
Hi Deborah-
Thank you so much..For some reason I needed some fun!
What a wonderful version of Jack and Jill! I love how you think, Lyn. I especially like the leaves sticking like postage stamps.
Creative take on the prompt. Well done.
Hi Book Bird Dog-
So happy that you enjoyed this..my sort of thing!
Hi Willow-
Well, you just bring out the best in me, and I aim to please! I think I'm channeling a mildly funny ghost!!
Hi Berowne-
So good of you to say so, this sort of thing just pops up, as I'm sure you know..
and thanks for visiting!!
Saints preserve us from inebriated monarchs...
Hi Jinksy-
Thanks for your funny response..I sure do appreciate your take!
it is absolutely super...
elegant magpie!
love this prompt.
Hi Jingle-
Always appreciate what you have to say..you are so kind!
Affixing themselves like postage stamps...what a hoot! This was wonderful from beginning to end!
Add one more postage stamp fan! Though 'tis hard to think of you looking bedraggled, Lyn!
Hi Mary Ann-
That this pleases you makes me very happy! A hoot, huh?? Good enough for me...
Hi Derrick-
Well, I'm giggling..it's all illusion, trust me!! ..and it's good to have another "stamp" fan..who knew??
excellent advice!!! duly noted! xxo
How very clever ... and so much fun! Perfect for Fall and all those slippery leaves! Drunken Monarchs too.
Hi Jeane-
Yes, definitely stay away from silly kings!
Hi Helen-
Just a little whimsy in autumn..thanks for your nice compliment!
This is wonderful. Makes me want to go out and roll around in the wet leaves...
Very fun take on this prompt!
Hi liv2write2day-
Hold off on the wet leaves, better to read about it than actually do it..but if you do, let me know!! Thanks so much...
Hi Kristen-
Sometimes I just can't help myself..smiling is good medicine! Thanks...
Oh you are a clever wit, whimsical, charming, humorous fairy tale from an adults point of view, extremely descriptive, ,,,my younger son use to love to roll down steep hills every time we went to the park or forest...when he hit bottom he would jump up elated with leaf, twig and dirt adhered to his whole self, I image your poem was what it was like..
so dear blog friend do you write from experience, sans the drunken monarch or maybe yes -?
great fun take on the Mag-- you made me forget why it was written.
Joanny
Lovely take on the prompt as well as on an old tale.
Love your humorous take on the ending tho!
This was kinda fun ...rolling down the hill like Jack & Jill. Hope Jack didn't break his crown.
Hi joanny-
It's all a mind thing..I get some pretty strange ideas, and make a poem out of them..if it turns out to be fun, I'm twice as pleased!
Tell your son to tumble away..you can only do it up to a certain point..thanks so much for your comments!!
Hi Reflections-
Thank you...Always happy to receive and share these great Prompts!!
Hi kathi-
So nice to hear from you...Poor Jack, I think he did have some damage done to his crown!!
clever clever you! Loved this take on the photo! I remember rolling down lots of hills! Never tho' with a drunken monarch!
Cool... Advice taken.. smiles
Enjoyed reading it a lot..
Postage stamps sticking out was so funny yet inevitable in a fall :)
Hi kathew-
What a blast..really rolling down a hill..but never with a silly king! Good to hear from you...
Lyn this is awesome...you are so creative and have your own sweet style! :-)
Hi Carrie-
What a lovely thing to say..I really try to write what's in me..all we can do..and have some fun too!
Never read a poem quite like this one, I give it an A+ on all counts, for originality, and for the incredible last stanza, loved every word!
Hi Terresa-
Thanks for your terrific support..Don't we all need it? I do get quirky notions from time to time!
like a snowball in autumn
Hi Rene-
I guess that means, surprise! thank you...
Hi Abhilasha-
So glad you liked this one..happy when you visit!!
haha. absoultely love the new take on teh old nursery rhyme...drunken monarchs...smiles...nice magpie!
Hi Brian-
Glad you enjoyed this little jest! Always happy when I can spread some glee!
Haha! I love the message!
Hi Tumblewords-
Yes, we have to choose our monarchs very carefully!! thanks...
Ha! Great take on the prompt, Lyn. I LOVE the humorous ending!
Brilliant. It's just brilliant. The mix of October's autumnal landscape with that hilarious ending are fabulous.
Greetings from London.
Hi Angie-
Thanks..I guess it's the punch line after all!
Greetings to a Cuban-
Boy, are you nice to have around!!Always appreciate what you have to say..thanks...
Ah! That's clever and chirpy! A real smiley pie for me!
Hi Lena-
Smiley pie! I like that...thanks so much for dropping by!
Ha ha! I love the leaves "affixing themselves like postage stamps."
Hi ~T~
Thanks for stopping by..glad you enjoyed this!
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