Thursday, October 7, 2010

MAGPIE/ Prompt #35


                                               photo/ willow/ magpie tales


JACK AND ME

Jack fell down.
I slipped and started to roll.
Over and over I went,
gravity showing no mercy,
nothing in my way to stop me.

I felt the crunch of October's leaves,
wintry reds and gray yellows
glossy with dew,
not softening my path,
but affixing themselves
like postage stamps,
poking my battered front and rear.

I gained thrust like a mythical goddess,
then felt a sharp pain
as I rolled over that broken crown
tumbling before me,

as if some wizard
had animated it
to mock me,
and win a race
to the bottom of the hill.

Pay attention
to what I say,
never go looking for water
at the top of a mountain
with a drunken monarch.



c copyright/all rights reserved/2010


This poem is in response to yet another terrific Prompt by Willow at Magpie Tales..who can resist..not many, for sure!!


http://www.minblu.blogspot.com/
http://twitter.com/lynxny

52 comments:

Deborah said...

What a wonderful take on the prompt, I loved it!

Book Bird Dog said...

Wonderful! i love it! and the humor at the end of the poem!
A Paradise of Spring

Lyn said...

Hi Deborah-
Thank you so much..For some reason I needed some fun!

Tess Kincaid said...

What a wonderful version of Jack and Jill! I love how you think, Lyn. I especially like the leaves sticking like postage stamps.

Berowne said...

Creative take on the prompt. Well done.

Lyn said...

Hi Book Bird Dog-
So happy that you enjoyed this..my sort of thing!

Lyn said...

Hi Willow-
Well, you just bring out the best in me, and I aim to please! I think I'm channeling a mildly funny ghost!!

Lyn said...

Hi Berowne-
So good of you to say so, this sort of thing just pops up, as I'm sure you know..
and thanks for visiting!!

Jinksy said...

Saints preserve us from inebriated monarchs...

Lyn said...

Hi Jinksy-
Thanks for your funny response..I sure do appreciate your take!

Linda Bob Grifins Korbetis Hall said...

it is absolutely super...
elegant magpie!
love this prompt.

Lyn said...

Hi Jingle-
Always appreciate what you have to say..you are so kind!

Blue Sky Dreaming said...

Affixing themselves like postage stamps...what a hoot! This was wonderful from beginning to end!

Unknown said...

Add one more postage stamp fan! Though 'tis hard to think of you looking bedraggled, Lyn!

Lyn said...

Hi Mary Ann-
That this pleases you makes me very happy! A hoot, huh?? Good enough for me...

Lyn said...

Hi Derrick-
Well, I'm giggling..it's all illusion, trust me!! ..and it's good to have another "stamp" fan..who knew??

Jeane Myers said...

excellent advice!!! duly noted! xxo

Helen said...

How very clever ... and so much fun! Perfect for Fall and all those slippery leaves! Drunken Monarchs too.

Lyn said...

Hi Jeane-
Yes, definitely stay away from silly kings!

Lyn said...

Hi Helen-
Just a little whimsy in autumn..thanks for your nice compliment!

Anonymous said...

This is wonderful. Makes me want to go out and roll around in the wet leaves...

Kristen Haskell said...

Very fun take on this prompt!

Lyn said...

Hi liv2write2day-
Hold off on the wet leaves, better to read about it than actually do it..but if you do, let me know!! Thanks so much...

Lyn said...

Hi Kristen-
Sometimes I just can't help myself..smiling is good medicine! Thanks...

joanna said...

Oh you are a clever wit, whimsical, charming, humorous fairy tale from an adults point of view, extremely descriptive, ,,,my younger son use to love to roll down steep hills every time we went to the park or forest...when he hit bottom he would jump up elated with leaf, twig and dirt adhered to his whole self, I image your poem was what it was like..
so dear blog friend do you write from experience, sans the drunken monarch or maybe yes -?
great fun take on the Mag-- you made me forget why it was written.
Joanny

Reflections said...

Lovely take on the prompt as well as on an old tale.

Love your humorous take on the ending tho!

kathi harris said...

This was kinda fun ...rolling down the hill like Jack & Jill. Hope Jack didn't break his crown.

Lyn said...

Hi joanny-
It's all a mind thing..I get some pretty strange ideas, and make a poem out of them..if it turns out to be fun, I'm twice as pleased!
Tell your son to tumble away..you can only do it up to a certain point..thanks so much for your comments!!

Lyn said...

Hi Reflections-
Thank you...Always happy to receive and share these great Prompts!!

Lyn said...

Hi kathi-
So nice to hear from you...Poor Jack, I think he did have some damage done to his crown!!

Kathe W. said...

clever clever you! Loved this take on the photo! I remember rolling down lots of hills! Never tho' with a drunken monarch!

Abhilasha-The Desire said...

Cool... Advice taken.. smiles
Enjoyed reading it a lot..
Postage stamps sticking out was so funny yet inevitable in a fall :)

Lyn said...

Hi kathew-
What a blast..really rolling down a hill..but never with a silly king! Good to hear from you...

Carrie Van Horn said...

Lyn this is awesome...you are so creative and have your own sweet style! :-)

Lyn said...

Hi Carrie-
What a lovely thing to say..I really try to write what's in me..all we can do..and have some fun too!

* said...

Never read a poem quite like this one, I give it an A+ on all counts, for originality, and for the incredible last stanza, loved every word!

Lyn said...

Hi Terresa-
Thanks for your terrific support..Don't we all need it? I do get quirky notions from time to time!

Unknown said...

like a snowball in autumn

Lyn said...

Hi Rene-
I guess that means, surprise! thank you...

Lyn said...

Hi Abhilasha-
So glad you liked this one..happy when you visit!!

Brian Miller said...

haha. absoultely love the new take on teh old nursery rhyme...drunken monarchs...smiles...nice magpie!

Lyn said...

Hi Brian-
Glad you enjoyed this little jest! Always happy when I can spread some glee!

Tumblewords: said...

Haha! I love the message!

Lyn said...

Hi Tumblewords-
Yes, we have to choose our monarchs very carefully!! thanks...

Angie Muresan said...

Ha! Great take on the prompt, Lyn. I LOVE the humorous ending!

A Cuban In London said...

Brilliant. It's just brilliant. The mix of October's autumnal landscape with that hilarious ending are fabulous.

Greetings from London.

Lyn said...

Hi Angie-
Thanks..I guess it's the punch line after all!

Lyn said...

Greetings to a Cuban-
Boy, are you nice to have around!!Always appreciate what you have to say..thanks...

Helena said...

Ah! That's clever and chirpy! A real smiley pie for me!

Lyn said...

Hi Lena-
Smiley pie! I like that...thanks so much for dropping by!

~T~ said...

Ha ha! I love the leaves "affixing themselves like postage stamps."

Lyn said...

Hi ~T~
Thanks for stopping by..glad you enjoyed this!

LinkWithin

Related Posts Widget for Blogs by LinkWithin