A MYSTERIOUS PHOTO points me in the direction of a Pantoum...thanks to Tess Kincaid at Magpie Tales.
FOLLOW ME
Follow me,
take any chair you wish,
you're the first to arrive.
But why so early?
Take any chair you wish,
I can feel your bated breath,
but why so early?
Your heart's beating a tattoo.
I can feel your bated breath,
a damp anticipation.
Your heart's beating a tattoo.
Stay.
A damp anticipation,
here's what you came for.
Stay.
Crowd's already rushing.
Here's what you came for,
footsteps in the sand,
crowd's already rushing,
darting here and there.
Footsteps in the sand,
you're the first to arrive,
darting here and there.
Follow me.
copyright/ all rights reserved/ 2011
http://www.minblu.blogspot.com
http://twitter.com/lynxny
34 comments:
excellent..great use of form...and love the feel of damp with anticipation...the heart beating tattoo...nice use of repitition...
Hi Brian-
Thank you so much..the Pantoum form does most of the work..I myself wonder where it's going!!
This is why I like forms. They take you such interesting places.
Well done!
=)
Hi Sue-
I so agree..those forms rescue me!! thank you!!
The repetition so works...a chant, a flirtation...magical.
fabulous pantoum Lyn
I'm a fan of forms, too, and this one was perfect for the prompt!
Very well done within the demands of the pantoum form.
Hi Blue Sky Dreaming-
thank you!! Sometimes I feel that I could go on and on with the verses...
Hi Isabel-
So pleased that you liked this..thank you!
Hi Laurie-
I'm so glad that this form exists, it is such an amazing style...thank you!
Hi Doctor FTSE-
Thank you for your comment..as you can see, I really like this form!
Woah, that Magpie photo has created a whole bunch of great offshoots of poems and stories. I really enjoyed this one.
I'm going to have to try this form. You have created a wonderful write. : )
A new favorite of yours for me Lyn....love the repitition....so captivating and magical! :-)
romantic and beautiful.
this points up how little I know about writing poetry and all the different 'forms'? - as always is feels very Lynesque - xo
Hi Sub-Radar-Mike-
Welcome..glad you dropped by and I so appreciate your comment...thanks!
Hi thingy-
I encourage you to try a pantoum, there's a very precise progression..have fun!!
Hi Carrie-
Lovely thing to say! I love magical...thanks!!
Hi Morning-
Very nice...thank you so much!
Hi Jeane-
Thank you..so glad to have achieved Lynesque status...leave it to you, my friend!!
That's good enough to set to music, Lyn.
8^)
Hi phil-
I'll leave it to you to do the singing! Thanks...
Terrific form - love this!
Hi Tumblewords-
It is a great form..it's an adventure! Thanks...
I've got to try this, it's not a form I've done before.
Amazing, how it makes sense at the end.
Hi Friko-
I hope you do try this, and it makes sense because the arc is built in..first line/ last line, the same. The pantoum always leads us where it wants to go..remember, the 2nd and 4th lines become the
1st and 3rd in the next stanza...the last stanza breaks that rule!! Thanks...
you always have such great expression, no matter what the form!
Hi Everyday Goddess-
How kind of you..we keep trying, don't we? Thanks...
Lively, engaging take on the prompt...
Hi Berowne-
Thank you... a pantoum usually does it for me!
I love the look and feel of your site. I love your attitude of creativity. A little note here, though. The credit for the photographer on this post is Rosie Hardy (http://www.flickr.com/photos/rosie_hardy/3061764656) You might want to add that and let Magpie Tales know it too. It's always a good thing to credit people whenever we can. Artists need to be recognized for their work!
Hi Ginger-
So pleased with your lovely comment..and thanks for pointing out the photographer of this enigmatic work..I checked the site..worth visiting..
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