Wednesday, July 7, 2010

BEAUTIFUL...


BEING BEAUTIFUL

I liked being beautiful.  I liked having people stare when I walked into a room.  I liked that men fell for me in feverish or stealthy ways.  I spent some time being sure that I knew where the exit was.

I got up one morning, sweat poking out of my pores, and threw the covers away forever.  I remembered, once, hearing my mother and grandmother hushing each other so I wouldn't hear them talk about the "change of life".  What would that be, I wondered.  Turning green?  Growing feathers?

My pheromones no longer woke the dead.  I alternated between a flamenco state of mind, castanets at the ready, as if I could still seduce.  And high diving into icy pools, seeking the cool ritual of renunciation as a holy ceremony.

I was set free.  My hormones jumped out of my body, never to return.  I was emancipated and found my tranquil self.  So glad to rest from cues.  Not being seen, not on view, I got used to it.  Without a bitter taste.

No dye or rouge can pinch my cheek back to its youth and here's a day at last when I put the covers back, make the bed that stays so neat, a hollow at my side filled by the cat.

No sorrow.  This long vacation from passion stirs memories, which may be mine or some I've seen in a movie or two, because I can't tell if that beauty up there is me or some other star. 


@copyright/all rights reserved/ 2010

http://www.minblu.blogspot.com/
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14 comments:

alaine@éclectique said...

I'm sure you're still beautiful, Lyn...and you have that marvellous shop (can't remember the name, started with S) that I visited on 7th Avenue at your recommendation....they had everything at your fingertips! But we know that less is more in the latter years and it's what you know that makes you shine, isn't it.

Derrick said...

Enjoyed this very much, Lyn, and am only glad not to suffer the torment!

Lyn said...

Hi Alaine-
I think you're talking about Sephora..they're all over the place..in fact there's one a block away from me!
Latter years..I just keep rolling them back..not really there yet!!

Lyn said...

Hi Derrick-
Thanks..you lucky guy!
And as a little ol' woman..bring it on!!

Blue Sky Dreaming said...

I like this post...wisdom with irony!
When I was 13 or so I received my first floral arrangement from a real florist...similar face vase as pictured here with a mixed bouquet and I thought I had gone to grown up girl heaven...?! ha

Helen said...

Dear Lyn,
You have, so beautifully, described how I feel today at 68 ... so beautifully!

Lyn said...

Hi Mary Ann-
I like that...grown up girl heaven...we've been there for a while!

Lyn said...

Hi Helen-
Thank you..I had a feeling a couple of "girls" would agree with me!

A Cuban In London said...

I held my breath until the very last word. And then re-read it. Your poems always go down a treat, but your prose is equally beautiful. But then, again, you knew that, didn't you? :-)

Greetings from London.

Lyn said...

Greetings to a Cuban-
Your comments put me on cloud 9! I sometimes fool myself..honestly...
Thanks, always....

Jingle said...

wise words.

Lyn said...

Hi Jingle-
Thank you..we keep trying!!

Stafford Ray said...

Your magpie was unusual in that it is 'useful' in a practical sense, but this piece is an ode to wisdom!
Every age has its beauty for those who see it. You do.

Lyn said...

Hi Stafford-
Thanks for your kind words..Yes, I am so practical..and still a bit of a dreamer!

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