Monday, October 31, 2011

MAGPIE/ Prompt #89

                                                                photo/ Tess Kincaid


LOOKING FOR THE GHOST in the machine..found it!  This PANTOUM is a thank you to Tess at Magpie Tales.


DEVIL IN THE DETAILS

You'll find the trick,
how he weaves himself
into the cracks,
the ruptures, the stigmata.

How he weaves himself.
I see the stain move.
The ruptures, the stigmata,
look away, look back.

I see the stain move
out of the corner of my eye.
Look away, look back,
turn inside out.

Out of the corner of my eye,
I see the color bleed away,
turn inside out,
changes my words.

I see the color bleed away.
He natters a lie into my ear,
changes my words,
fakes my pleasure.

He natters a lie into my ear,
into the cracks,
fakes my pleasure.
You'll find the trick.


A Pantoum is a poetic form, first appeared in the 15th century in Malaysia.  The modern version is a poem of indefinite length and repetition. 


copyright/ all rights reserved/ 2011

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HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

34 comments:

Kathy Bischoping said...

I like this form. And the hovering feeling of your series-of-culminating-Ks closing line. It's like there's an echo of how the poem could continue even though it has ended.

Lyn said...

Hi Kathy-
Thanks so much..that's what I like about the form, it's sort of taken out of my hands at some point!

Blue Sky Dreaming said...

I too like this form...you have made it great by a wonderful choice of lines to repeat...as a chant...as words that grip at what makes me want to look away. Thanks again for the ride!

Lyn said...

Hi Blue Sky-
I love the hypnotic elements of this form..thank you..

WINDOWLAD said...

..interesting form and piece.. a bit confused 'bout the arrangement so i need to go through each line and took a further study.. i think 'tis a li'l tricky like that of a sestina.. brave take!(:

Good day!

~Kelvin

Lyn said...

Hi Windowlad-
I sort of have to keep a road map when I do one of these, else I might lose my grip! Thanks.....

Roy Schulze said...

What an intriguing form, I can almost hear this being sung, like a round. My Magpie this week is Poet.

Lyn said...

Hi Roy-
I'd be into hearing it sung..but not by my voice..this ancient form has far to go! Thank you..

Laurie Kolp said...

I agree... the pantoum form works perfectly to enhance your effect. Love it!

Brian Miller said...

nice...wrote my first pantoun not too long ago the repitition and dance of the words fits this well...the moving ink blot...turning inside out...surreal and fitting for the season...

Brigid said...

Clever and surreal and hypnotic.

Lyn said...

Hi Laurie-
So glad you like it..thank you!

Lyn said...

Hi Brian-
Good that you've tried this...sometimes it's the only way to go...especially with off-beat ideas...thanks!

Lyn said...

Hi Brigid-
That's why I like this form..it just sort of happens once you start...

Carrie Burtt said...

What an amazing form Lyn....this is captivating. :-)

Lyn said...

Hi Carrie-
Definitely one of my favorites (form)..thank you so much!

thingy said...

Dang, that is clever. Love it. : )

Isabel Doyle said...

I love pantoums - you did a great job with the prompt and the form!

Tumblewords: said...

Wonderful pantoum! The lines for repetition are well chosen.

Lyn said...

Hi thingy-
Really appreciate that "dang"!!Thank you...

Lyn said...

Hi Isabel-
Thank you..It's always interesting for me to see where a pantoum will go!

Lyn said...

Hi Tumblewords-
So glad you enjoyed this..the lines seem to create themselves...thanks!

dori said...

WOW that was BEYOND clever!!! How the heck did you do that? REALLY, really good. WOW!!!

Lyn said...

Hi dori-
Thank you for your enthusiasm! It just takes a bit of concentration...

gautami tripathy said...

Loved it!

innards

Tess Kincaid said...

Oh, gosh I love the word "stigmata"...wonderful write, Lyn...by the way, I always enjoy Sargent...

Christine said...

interesting, will have to investigate this form

Lyn said...

Hi Gautami-
So happy to hear from you...thanks!

Lyn said...

Hi Tess-
I love to even say "stigmata", agree with you..also, wouldn't it have been something to be painted by Sargent?? Thanks for all the doors!!

Lyn said...

Hi Christine-
Thank you..it is worth looking into..a good challenge!

Martin said...

Nice poem, in an interesting form.

Bee's Blog said...

Oh gosh what a clever take. Excellent. I like the 'stigmata' too.

Lyn said...

Hi Martin-
Good to hear from you...thanks a lot!!

Lyn said...

Hi Bee-
It's funny about certain words! Grateful that they exist...thanks!!

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