I FACED THE MIRROR THIS MORNING WITH A BIT OF TREPIDATION. But really grateful to be actually standing there. A slight purple, green, yellow tint had settled on the left side of my forehead. Reason for that? Bashed my head in yesterday morning..
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You'd think that after living here for sooo long I'd remember that I have a big white sink in the bathroom. Well, I didn't. I decided to brush some cat fuzz off my leggings. Holding my hair dryer in one hand , I bent down quickly and somehow just hit myself upside my head. Left side of my forehead, an old place that has a natural bump on it by this time, because that's the spot that always got smashed when I was a kid. But with such warp force that a lurking enemy couldn't have done more damage.
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Blackness, then hitting the floor, then dropping the dryer..then being sort of conscious and wondering if I had just killed myself. And broken my dryer. Then I thought of that poor Richardson actress who died last year after slipping on the ice and hitting her head and dying not then, but a few days later. And so maybe I still had time to sort things out.
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So there I was, on the floor, whimpering and realizing that all the doctors visits and tests
I've recently gone through won't save me from an instantaneous disaster. I really believe that we must live our lives as if we were the Twin Towers, and that at any moment a terrorist can seal our fate. In this case, I am my own terrorist. In other words, live for the moment.
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So, I thought, if I can stand, whom shall I call?? My doctor? But it's Sunday, really have this thing about bothering people..I don't like to die on someone's day off. Then I thought of an ambulance. What a spectacle that would be, me too proud to get on a stretcher, hobbling along behind the equipment, just to show that I'm a good little soldier. Then I thought that I'd just go to the emergency room at the hospital, by myself, take the subway to save money, and hope I don't faint or something (die) and embarrass myself.
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Or as I did in actuality, got up, stared at myself in the mirror, whimpered some more, watched bump increase in size, wondered if it's fatal, got some ice (wobbly legs got me to the kitchen). Pressed ice to forehead...oohhh, pain and cold...Decided that if this is it, at least I won't suffer.
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Got a plan together: 1. Maybe visit medical facility at Duane Reed around the corner..how much do they charge? 2. Call Dr.. Not so fast..still have my hang-ups.. 3. What to do about my food shopping? Will have to buy enough to last a few days, just in case I live. 4. Suddenly felt hungry..a good sign, they say. 5. Test hair dryer..IT WORKS! Will definitely do my hair, just in case I do have to go somewhere. 6. Study face and gingerly touch bump. All of this sped through my mind in a nanno-second.
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What I really did : 1. Blow-dried my hair, brushed a bang over bump. 2. Had a sandwich. 3. Dressed for Arctic winter. Wrapped scarf as high as it would go while still maintaing breathing. Pulled hat as low as it would go...ouch! 4. Went to market..will have enough to eat for several days, by then I imagine my brain will have done what it must. 5. Tired..but DON'T GO TO SLEEP. That's what they say if you have a head injury. Except by last night I was really out of it, fell asleep during Grammy Awards, Emma, World's Worst Cooks...etc. 6. Awoke at 1:00 AM and had some cheesecake...jeez, I was semi-delirious, for heaven's sake! 7. Awoke this morning!..Surprise! I'm alive! Purple bump, yellow edges, looking somewhat like a Picasso. Still achy breaky when I touch it. So don't touch it.
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