Friday, January 28, 2011

ROSES ONCE MORE/ A Pantoum


I've mentioned before that I have a real fondness for the poetic form known as the PANTOUM.  It's a form that first appeared in the 15th century in Malayan literature.  The Western version is a poem of indefinite length made up of stanzas whose four lines are repeated in a pattern, and whose last stanza is a bit twisty.  I still have to refer to notes when I try to tackle a Pantoum.  Lines 2 and 4 become lines 1 and 3 in the next stanza..this will help!!  The point is that each line gets to appear twice.


ROSES ONCE MORE

Help me live like a streak of lightning,
please solve my failure to float.
I'm shouting into my hand
as I clutch a tiny saint.

Please solve my failure to float.
Push me off the ledge,
as I clutch a tiny saint.
Let me see passion and roses once more.

Push me off the ledge.
I'm stir crazy by now,
let me see passion and roses once more.
Don't care if love's a cliche'.

I'm stir crazy by now,
seems like I'm nailed to the wall.
Don't care if love's a cliche',
make it shine like crystal again.

Seems like I'm nailed to the wall.
I'm shouting into my hand,
make it shine like crystal again.
Help me live like a streak of lightning.

copyright/all rights reserved/2011


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10 comments:

kathew said...

wow- thanks for the Pantoum explanation - I can see how one would have to keep the "rules" by their writing desk...lovely poem
especially the last line.

Lyn said...

Hi kathew-
Every once in a while I have to do a pantoum, shake the cobwebs out of my brain..Thanks for your comment..try it!!

jane.healy said...

I should have read the explanation in full before reading for the first time!
Actually works very well.

Lyn said...

Hi Jane-
I sort of like the poem to stand as is..but the explanation does seem important...thank you!!

Friko said...

A pantoum is very like a villanelle.
It's fun to play with different formal form of poetry.
This one works very well.

Lyn said...

Hi Friko-
I will try a villanelle again..what I like about the Pantoum is that it forces us to reveal things as the words unfold..the subtext really gets me!

Windsmoke. said...

Another challenge for me to tackle as well as the Erasure Poem. I've written down your explanation and rules for the Pantoum Poem on a piece of paper so like you i can refer to them when i decide to write one, when i don't know. Fantastic Pantoum Poem.

Lyn said...

Hi Windsmoke-
I'm generally not one to follow form, but for some reason I like the Pantoum. Good luck if you try..it's a good game! Thanks!!

Linda said...

Interesting, and probably more difficult to accomplish than the ones that rhyme, which is what I gravitate to.

Lyn said...

Hi Linda-
Thank you..I'm glad to say that the poem never turns out as I suspect it will..I like to play around with it.

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