LOOKING FOR THE GHOST in the machine..found it! This PANTOUM is a thank you to Tess at Magpie Tales.
DEVIL IN THE DETAILS
You'll find the trick,
how he weaves himself
into the cracks,
the ruptures, the stigmata.
How he weaves himself.
I see the stain move.
The ruptures, the stigmata,
look away, look back.
I see the stain move
out of the corner of my eye.
Look away, look back,
turn inside out.
Out of the corner of my eye,
I see the color bleed away,
turn inside out,
changes my words.
I see the color bleed away.
He natters a lie into my ear,
changes my words,
fakes my pleasure.
He natters a lie into my ear,
into the cracks,
fakes my pleasure.
You'll find the trick.
A Pantoum is a poetic form, first appeared in the 15th century in Malaysia. The modern version is a poem of indefinite length and repetition.
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HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
33 comments:
I like this form. And the hovering feeling of your series-of-culminating-Ks closing line. It's like there's an echo of how the poem could continue even though it has ended.
Hi Kathy-
Thanks so much..that's what I like about the form, it's sort of taken out of my hands at some point!
I too like this form...you have made it great by a wonderful choice of lines to repeat...as a chant...as words that grip at what makes me want to look away. Thanks again for the ride!
Hi Blue Sky-
I love the hypnotic elements of this form..thank you..
..interesting form and piece.. a bit confused 'bout the arrangement so i need to go through each line and took a further study.. i think 'tis a li'l tricky like that of a sestina.. brave take!(:
Good day!
~Kelvin
Hi Windowlad-
I sort of have to keep a road map when I do one of these, else I might lose my grip! Thanks.....
What an intriguing form, I can almost hear this being sung, like a round. My Magpie this week is Poet.
Hi Roy-
I'd be into hearing it sung..but not by my voice..this ancient form has far to go! Thank you..
I agree... the pantoum form works perfectly to enhance your effect. Love it!
nice...wrote my first pantoun not too long ago the repitition and dance of the words fits this well...the moving ink blot...turning inside out...surreal and fitting for the season...
Clever and surreal and hypnotic.
Hi Laurie-
So glad you like it..thank you!
Hi Brian-
Good that you've tried this...sometimes it's the only way to go...especially with off-beat ideas...thanks!
Hi Brigid-
That's why I like this form..it just sort of happens once you start...
What an amazing form Lyn....this is captivating. :-)
Hi Carrie-
Definitely one of my favorites (form)..thank you so much!
Dang, that is clever. Love it. : )
I love pantoums - you did a great job with the prompt and the form!
Wonderful pantoum! The lines for repetition are well chosen.
Hi thingy-
Really appreciate that "dang"!!Thank you...
Hi Isabel-
Thank you..It's always interesting for me to see where a pantoum will go!
Hi Tumblewords-
So glad you enjoyed this..the lines seem to create themselves...thanks!
WOW that was BEYOND clever!!! How the heck did you do that? REALLY, really good. WOW!!!
Hi dori-
Thank you for your enthusiasm! It just takes a bit of concentration...
Oh, gosh I love the word "stigmata"...wonderful write, Lyn...by the way, I always enjoy Sargent...
interesting, will have to investigate this form
Hi Gautami-
So happy to hear from you...thanks!
Hi Tess-
I love to even say "stigmata", agree with you..also, wouldn't it have been something to be painted by Sargent?? Thanks for all the doors!!
Hi Christine-
Thank you..it is worth looking into..a good challenge!
Nice poem, in an interesting form.
Oh gosh what a clever take. Excellent. I like the 'stigmata' too.
Hi Martin-
Good to hear from you...thanks a lot!!
Hi Bee-
It's funny about certain words! Grateful that they exist...thanks!!
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